Four Years Later

16 Dec
Four years ago, I made the worst best decision of my life.
Fast forward to today, I think we’re doing pretty well. Paolo is now a Palanca award winning author and has 2 titles out on Amazon (High Society and Alternative Alamat). I, on the other hand, have recently left firm life and am working for a good company that gives me the work-life balance that I need. More importantly, we have been blessed with a bouncing bear who always keeps us on our toes.
A few months before we got married,  I forced convinced Paolo to join this blog contest. The prizes were pretty substantial – I think they were worth over P20k. Unfortunately, we lost, but Paolo’s essay was considered as a “selected entry” and was likewise featured.
Anyway, I just remembered the entry Pao made last night while trying to put the Meia to sleep. Below is the full text of it, for your reading pleasure.
I swear motherhood is making me soft. Now, I’m blogging about our anniversary.
by Paolo Chikiamco
I honestly think that there is no greater indicia of love, than that scintillating, trembling desire to take your partner in your arms – and wring her neck.OK, so, maybe that’s not very normal of me. Then again, my relationship with my bride-to-be is not very normal either, which suits both of us just fine. I’m one of those uncommon male forms who would much rather sit in a corner with a book than go out drinking with even the most beauteous of women. As for Shaps, her idea of a perfect day would start with a trip to the zoo, detour to a Lewis Black comedy cuss-show, then end with a jump into the mosh pit at an Aerosmith concert. Those descriptions might seem to place us squarely within the “opposites attract” couples sub-genre, but as usual looks can be deceiving – there is a happy overlap to most of our interests that accounts for the fact that I will enjoy her perfect day almost as much as she herself would, and vice-versa.That is not to say that we never disagree, but the very fact that we can actually engage in pointed, passionate and quite heated arguments is a cornerstone of our relationship. As lawyers, neither Shaps nor I are the timid, reticent type, and it is refreshing indeed to be able to argue to the best of one’s ability, pulling no punches, because you know your partner is not likely to be swayed merely by your fancy vocabulary, nor the force of your personality. I know I’m quite often wrong in my positions, but it is a rare thing to find someone who can weather my oft-bombastic tirades and also fire back with succinct arguments as to just how and why I am wrong. Shaps, bless her heart, makes it a personal mission to prove me wrong. Frequently… and with evident glee.To this day she never makes me forget that, technically speaking, she’s never officially agreed to be my girlfriend. She has etched in her memory those painstakingly crafted words that my younger, quite nervous self asked her those six years ago: “Shaps… will you consider becoming my girlfriend.” Which means, she points out, that I have basically been undergoing nothing but a lengthy probation.Apparently though, I have acquitted myself well enough to convince her to give me her “official” assent when we get married this December (or not… it wouldn’t be completely out of character for her to say ‘I don’t’ if I manage to screw up before then, for instance by once again failing to put the “_” in my “^_^” smiley face). As long as no one forces her to wear a veil (“Do you not want to look at my face?”) or march down the aisle to anything other than Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters”, I’m sure we’ll be fine, and well on our way to years of marital bliss, detouring inevitably into the occasional mental neck-wringing.
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Posted by on 12/16/2011 in Others, Uncategorized


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